#RejectedDebateConditions: Rules, Crowley complaints, Axelrod spin = gold

http://twitter.com/#!/davidaxelrod/status/257937684390096897

Oh, dear. He’s ready for a vigorous debate and questions from all corners? Then why the debate rules, Davey?

A request from both campaigns for Tuesday’s debate: no tough follow-up questions from moderator Candy Crowley. on.wsj.com/RMN7n9

— Wall Street Journal (@WSJ) October 15, 2012

Of course, it is framed as “tough follow-up” from Crowley. What that really means is “shilling for Obama.” How sad is it that Obama is so incompetent, that they are afraid softball questions will be too hard for him?

Debate commission cracks down on Candy… drudge.tw/V2fhAJ

— DRUDGE REPORT (@DRUDGE_REPORT) October 15, 2012

Mark Knoller explains, and he’s none too happy.

Obama Campaign’s David Axelrod just tweeted: “Enough already about moderators. POTUS is ready for a vigorous debate & Q’s from all comers!”

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) October 15, 2012

No real reporter would agree to forgo followup questions and just call on audience members.

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) October 15, 2012

If that’s all Debate Commission wanted, it should have hired a game show host.

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) October 15, 2012

Bet they didn’t have a 21-page Memorandum of Understanding for the LIncoln-Douglas Debate

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) October 15, 2012

Thanks to Time’s @markhalperin, you can plow through the thick legalese of the Debate Memorandum of Understanding at thepage.time.com/2012/10/15/the…

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) October 15, 2012

Memo of Understanding neglects to provide for Debate Police to storm stage & wrestle moderator to the ground if she asks a followup.

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) October 15, 2012

@wmerknc @drewmtips This is a presidential debate. Not Dancing With The Stars. They can handle a surprise question or two.

— Mark Knoller (@markknoller) October 15, 2012

NRO’s Jim Geraghty gets to the bottom of the debate rules.

Here we go. Debate agreement, Sec. 7, SubSec C, para vi: “If sighted, ‘Ponytail Guy’ is to be removed from the building by security.’”

— jimgeraghty (@jimgeraghty) October 15, 2012

Heh.

Rules of tomorrow night’s debate say no “speeches, statements, or comments” by audience questioners. We’ll see if they hold to that.

— jimgeraghty (@jimgeraghty) October 15, 2012

This is a fascinating, real debate condition: Neither candidate may point to or cite folks in the audience besides family members.

— jimgeraghty (@jimgeraghty) October 15, 2012

Another fascinating, real debate condition: Neither candidate is allowed to ask direct questions of the other.

— jimgeraghty (@jimgeraghty) October 15, 2012

This, of course, led to much hilarity as Twitter users come up with debate conditions that were rejected.

Teleprompters permitted, but only every other word of prepared text is loaded. #RejectedDebateConditions

— jimgeraghty (@jimgeraghty) October 15, 2012

Gatorade break at the 45 minute mark. #RejectedDebateConditions

— jimgeraghty (@jimgeraghty) October 15, 2012

If you don’t know the answer, you can give your opponent an atomic wedgie#RejectedDebateConditions

— Nathan Wurtzel (@NathanWurtzel) October 15, 2012

Each candidate permitted one “wacky” illustrative prop. #RejectedDebateConditions

— jimgeraghty (@jimgeraghty) October 15, 2012

The first 30 minutes shall be conducted in Rap Battle format. #RejectedDebateConditions

— Matt Cover (@MattCover) October 15, 2012

Candidates will refrain from telling stories abt random people they claim they met while on the campaign trail #RejectedDebateConditions

— Andy Levy (@andylevy) October 15, 2012

Candidates may evade the question, but only in a high-pitched Mickey Mouse voice.#rejecteddebateconditions

— Popehat (@Popehat) October 15, 2012

Feats of Strength Competition#RejectedDebateConditions

— DrewM (@DrewMTips) October 15, 2012

Giggles RT @gaypatriot: No munching on dogs during commercial breaks.
#RejectedDebateConditions

— BiasedGirl (@BiasedGirl) October 15, 2012

#rejecteddebateconditions No whiny questions from college students.

— DiploMatt (@mdrache) October 15, 2012

Heh. RT @southsalem: #RejectedDebateConditions @msnbc has to wait until end of debate to declare obama the winner

— BiasedGirl (@BiasedGirl) October 15, 2012

Each candidate gets one “phone a friend” lifeline#RejectedDebateConditions

— DrewM (@DrewMTips) October 15, 2012

@jimgeraghty Split screen replaced with Picture-in-Picture of MLB playoffs #RejectedDebateConditions

— Joseph Sorbera (@JoeSorberaIII) October 15, 2012

Interpretive dance off. #RejectedDebateConditions

— Shawn Gorrell (@cheesewz) October 15, 2012

Sideline reaction by Obamaphone lady between questions #RejectedDebateConditions

— Matthew DesOrmeaux (@cynicusprime) October 15, 2012

All audience members in attendance must refrain from drinking games. #RejectedDebateConditions

— jimgeraghty (@jimgeraghty) October 15, 2012

Thank goodness that one was rejected! We already have our game set: Every time Obama says “Uh” or “Um.” Be sure to eat well first, or you will be faced in short order!

More, please, Twitter. A debate condition that has not been rejected: Lots of happy warrior snark required.