Going to the supermarket without your kids feels like a week in Jamaica.
1. When you’re the first person in your family to wake up.
Those eight minutes before your kids come barreling into the kitchen asking for breakfast are yours and yours alone!
2. Pumping gas.
The 90 seconds when your kids are inside the car and you’re outside of it offer a wonderful chance to unwind. Take a deep breath (but not too deep because, you know, gas) and let your troubles fade away.
3. Being on hold with the bank.
Your kids generally know to leave you alone when you’re on the phone, so sit back, relax, and enjoy the feedback-y version of “Waterfalls.”
4. Waiting in line without your kids.
That long line at the pharmacy is a welcome respite from the world if your kids are at home with someone else. Enjoy the piped-in ’90s soft rock as it drowns out the persistent cough of the guy behind you!
5. When your kid thinks they’re in trouble.
Your chaotic home will be transformed into a center of relaxation as your suddenly quiet kid tip-toes around you!
6. Nap time.
The moment your baby falls asleep feels as freeing as dipping your feet into the water at Waikiki Beach. Just don’t get trapped under your baby or your entire mini-vacation will happen in the same place!
7. The six minutes after your kid opens a new toy.
Those precious moments before your kid tosses the toy aside and demands your attention are yours to enjoy any way you wish! Get creative!
8. When a new episode of your kids’ favorite show is on.
For the next half hour you’ll feel as if you’re in a Parisian cafe as you drink coffee and surf the web. You might even try to read a few pages of a book!
9. Going to the bathroom.
Granted, most trips to the bathroom are punctuated by visits from your kids asking for a snack, but in those rare occurrences you’re left alone this is 100% “me time!”
10. When your kid goes to to the bathroom.
This is a glorious opportunity to take care of yourself, but be forewarned: The mini-vacation can end abruptly when your kid yells, “Mommy/Daddy! I need help!”
11. A trip to the supermarket without your kids.
Casually strolling the aisles without once having to yell, “PUT THAT BACK!” is nearly as relaxing as a spa day in Napa Valley. Treat yourself to a free sample!
12. When your kid thinks they’re getting away with something.
You know they’re playing on your iPad after you said it was off-limits, but they’re doing it so quietly that you don’t care. Enjoy the tranquility!
13. Getting the mail.
Once the front door closes behind you you’ve got 15 child-free steps to the mailbox to enjoy! And then — bonus — 15 more steps back inside!
14. After your kids have gone to sleep.
Assuming you don’t have to spend this time doing all the stuff you couldn’t get done during the day because your kids were all up in your business, you can kick back like you’re riding a gondola through the Venice canals! Rejoice!